Chapter 21: Win Some, Lose Some More
Konnichiwat it do ladies and gents and everyone in between, 𝑰𝒕 𝑰𝒔 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑬𝒏𝒅 𝑶𝒇 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝒀𝒆𝒂𝒓 𝑨𝒈𝒂𝒊𝒏 𝑨𝒍𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒚 𝑶𝒉 𝑮𝒐𝒅 𝑶𝒉 𝑭𝒖 here, and it's finally that time once more.
Boy golly, this year's been... somethin'. I dunno how to describe it exactly but oh, it's somethin' alright.
Satu hal yang pasti, it's a major improvement from 2018. A lot more happening this year, more events attended, more people met, more places seen, more hours worked, I mean it's probably my busiest year post high school, to be honest.
Which is weird, saying that, because as busy as I was doing all these new, different stuffs, I had enough time to hit the brakes every so often. Sesekali, gue menyempatkan untuk sekadar keluar rumah aja, biar gak mumet. It took me almost four years to realize that Beppu is probably the best place to just have a walk. Kota tepi pantai, populasi gak lebih dari 125,000 jiwa, polusi udara rendah, jalur pejalan kaki luas, jambret jarang-jarang, it's bliss. But to me, the crown jewel has got to be Beppu Park. Di Jakarta, kalo ada orang nyebut kata "taman", konotasi yang muncul di kepala gue lebih banyak negatif daripada positif. Pedagang kaki lima dengan grobak segede gaban, pasangan-pasangan mesra di atas motor Vario, sampah berserakan, berbagai macam asap beracun berkumpul jadi satu, pantesan aja mall penuh mulu tiap akhir minggu.
Tapi ini Jepang. Semuanya bersih. Semuanya teratur. Gue sering meluangkan waktu pergi ke taman kota on my off days, kadang untuk baca buku, tapi sering kali gue ke Beppu Park ya cuma buat refreshing aja. I just go there, walk around, sit down, just soaking it all in, y'know?
Orang pacaran tetep banyak sih, but the park is at least big enough for me to avoid them. I have nothing against romantic couples doing romantic-couply-stuffs in public, don't get me wrong, tapi kadang mereka lupa kalau mereka sedang berada di ruang publik, tiba-tiba melakukan hal-hal yang seharusnya tidak dilakukan sepasang manusia yang belum melewati jenjang pernikahan. Saya jijik.
Okay, what was I on again? Right, 2019.
Let's start from the beginning. The gear probably started turning right around March, when I went back to Indonesia for spring break. Met up with a few old faces, had a whale of a time, but ended on a slightly bitter note. That said, he seems to be doing fairly well, dare I say he's even living his best life right now, so I'm happy for him. Hey, if I could cut myself off from my life, I'd probably be happy too.
Then of course, I did the usual annual thing with Tinder, made a few new friends, and to my surprise, one actually became quite a company. If I were correct, I managed to meet three of my matches, one in Semarang (the cafe girl, which you can read more here), one I met up with on the day of my departure, it was a girl who grew up in Qatar, and then of course Cylona, my now good friend who, for some reason, agreed to go and visit the zoo with me.
There was another Tinder-matched girl that, after spring break, though we didn't get to meet up, I actually talked to for quite an extended period of time.
Then she got a boyfriend.
No room for overseas virtual male-friend anymore, bucko.
We matched when I was in Bandung, and she went under the moniker Rosetta. An artsy, BTS stan who has a hobby of not replying messages. It may have only been towards me, but she claimed otherwise, but who knows. We talked on Tinder, up until she told me her real name isn't Rosetta, she doesn't like Tinder, and asked for my other social media account, and continued talking there. We kinda stopped talking around August, and to be completely fair to her, I was kinda running dry on conversation topics as well, so I wouldn't put it all on her that we stopped talking. Her real name is, well, I'm not gonna say it, of course, but ehh let's put it this way.
You wouldn't wanna go against her if you're playing Smash online. The top definition of an oonga boonga character. They could practically button-mash their way to victory. I hate.
Right, anyhow, enough of that overly niche analogy, moving on.
It's sad that the Tinder Tradition's came to an end. Nggak juga sih, if anything I think it's the opposite. Eh, but I mean, I dunno. I'll admit, my spring breaks back home would all be nothing but complete snooze fests if it weren't for that app, and I did have a lot of... interesting interactions with equally interesting people, though a majority of them I don't even talk to anymore, which segues perfectly into why I don't like it. A lot of the interactions I had on (and from) there is short-lived, and I guess that's the whole point of the app? I dunno, but needless to say, it feels like anyone that actually keeps in touch with you for more than a week after the match is an outlier. A month? Almost equal to winning the powerball. Anything beyond that is probably God's way of showing that He's feeling sorry for you.
... saying that, I do have Cylona and Agar for my case, but shshshhhh dasnotthepoint, okay? Again,
o u t l i e r s.
But yeah, I do feel like the small serotonin bursts from getting those matches are not really worth the time and effort (and data) anymore. Not to mention, being an emotionally starved entity myself, it doesn't satisfy anymore, and the whole experience only makes me feel worse afterwards, generally speaking.
Lepas libur musim semi dan gue kembali ke Jepang, things simmered down a bit, and everything went back to a plateau for a whole semester long. But it got interesting again come summer time, around September, as I got my second job as a pool guard (which, by the way, post still on the way, I'm just a big sad slob) and also, that whole fiasco with the teaching job happened (which you can read here).
Dan, dalam sekejap November tiba, dan gue dapet lagi kerjaan sebagai guru bahasa Inggris. Namun, kali ini kerjaannya di Fukuoka, and it was a complete 180 from the previous teaching gig. First off, the venue. It was at a country club, located just outside of the main city. I'll tell you what, I've never been to a place that reeks the upper class more than this place, boy it was fan-cy. Everything was accommodated, too, from the train tickets (to and fro), the overnight stay, and even the food. On top of that, the students this time around were waaay more active and enthusiastic than the previous. They were 10th graders, and while their English is still on the iffy side, it was pretty obvious that this school has a much better English program than the last one. It was only a two day program, but those two days are more memorable than anything else I've done in my recent history.
Finally, December came. An old friend of mine, Estrella, now known as Hokben ever since he's lived in Japan, came to visit Beppu. We went on a little road trip to Nagasaki, and man was it a blast. A two-day, sleep-in-car-while-parked-in-parking-building type of trip, but it was great time. Nagasaki's one helluva city. I like very much yes. Also, we talked a lot about our past. And feelings. And other mushy stuffs. It was like 2am, you know what happens to two bros in a bedroom together during those hours. May or may not make a separate post about this one.
Now here we are. The dawn, well, not really, the late afternoon of the final day. Guess what I'm doing tonight.
Working that late shift, baby.
Since a lot of the part-time pool guards are off somewhere to celebrate new year, I was asked to work this new year's eve. Initially, I didn't wanna, but then they asked me to do it, and I don't know how to say "no". I mean, on the bright side, it does mean more money for moi, and a little extra bread couldn't hurt. Besides, not like I have anything better to do anyway. Off to a party? Unlikely. Drinking? I don't do that, too. Getting a new year's kiss? Sama siapa nyet. By working, at least I'm not spending another new year eating McDonald's. In my bedroom. Alone.
I am fully intending to keep up the New Year's McDonald's, though.
But yeah, that's another year in the books. Sorry I haven't been posting, I have a lot of time to write but often time, my mind's just not into it.
Year number twenty one was a pleasant surprise, though it really doesn't take much for me to have a "good" year, but still. And also, what a decade it has been, eh? Did the first half of the decade even happen? I vaguely remember being an absolute asswipe, but it all felt like such a distant past, like a dream, almost. And with everything that's happened in this 10-year time frame, it does beg the question,
how the hell am I still alive?
Welp, dunno, don't care, and I ain't gonna ask too many questions, but for whatever reason it may be, I'm just grateful to be here.
Anyhooooo, I guess I'm gonna end this with another thank you, for reading my nonsensical online diary ramblings. I know there's not that many of you, but still, I'm truly thankful, like for real, from the bottom of my heart, it means a lot, I just can't express it enough.
And of course, happy new year y'all. Hope you all had a great year, and decade, for that matter. If you didn't, well I hope there's plenty to learn from for you to take going into this new year and new decade. Let's try and make it a much better one, eh?
Here's to a swell 2020. Be safe out there.
xo,
R
Which is weird, saying that, because as busy as I was doing all these new, different stuffs, I had enough time to hit the brakes every so often. Sesekali, gue menyempatkan untuk sekadar keluar rumah aja, biar gak mumet. It took me almost four years to realize that Beppu is probably the best place to just have a walk. Kota tepi pantai, populasi gak lebih dari 125,000 jiwa, polusi udara rendah, jalur pejalan kaki luas, jambret jarang-jarang, it's bliss. But to me, the crown jewel has got to be Beppu Park. Di Jakarta, kalo ada orang nyebut kata "taman", konotasi yang muncul di kepala gue lebih banyak negatif daripada positif. Pedagang kaki lima dengan grobak segede gaban, pasangan-pasangan mesra di atas motor Vario, sampah berserakan, berbagai macam asap beracun berkumpul jadi satu, pantesan aja mall penuh mulu tiap akhir minggu.
Tapi ini Jepang. Semuanya bersih. Semuanya teratur. Gue sering meluangkan waktu pergi ke taman kota on my off days, kadang untuk baca buku, tapi sering kali gue ke Beppu Park ya cuma buat refreshing aja. I just go there, walk around, sit down, just soaking it all in, y'know?
Orang pacaran tetep banyak sih, but the park is at least big enough for me to avoid them. I have nothing against romantic couples doing romantic-couply-stuffs in public, don't get me wrong, tapi kadang mereka lupa kalau mereka sedang berada di ruang publik, tiba-tiba melakukan hal-hal yang seharusnya tidak dilakukan sepasang manusia yang belum melewati jenjang pernikahan. Saya jijik.
Okay, what was I on again? Right, 2019.
Let's start from the beginning. The gear probably started turning right around March, when I went back to Indonesia for spring break. Met up with a few old faces, had a whale of a time, but ended on a slightly bitter note. That said, he seems to be doing fairly well, dare I say he's even living his best life right now, so I'm happy for him. Hey, if I could cut myself off from my life, I'd probably be happy too.
Then of course, I did the usual annual thing with Tinder, made a few new friends, and to my surprise, one actually became quite a company. If I were correct, I managed to meet three of my matches, one in Semarang (the cafe girl, which you can read more here), one I met up with on the day of my departure, it was a girl who grew up in Qatar, and then of course Cylona, my now good friend who, for some reason, agreed to go and visit the zoo with me.
There was another Tinder-matched girl that, after spring break, though we didn't get to meet up, I actually talked to for quite an extended period of time.
Then she got a boyfriend.
No room for overseas virtual male-friend anymore, bucko.
We matched when I was in Bandung, and she went under the moniker Rosetta. An artsy, BTS stan who has a hobby of not replying messages. It may have only been towards me, but she claimed otherwise, but who knows. We talked on Tinder, up until she told me her real name isn't Rosetta, she doesn't like Tinder, and asked for my other social media account, and continued talking there. We kinda stopped talking around August, and to be completely fair to her, I was kinda running dry on conversation topics as well, so I wouldn't put it all on her that we stopped talking. Her real name is, well, I'm not gonna say it, of course, but ehh let's put it this way.
You wouldn't wanna go against her if you're playing Smash online. The top definition of an oonga boonga character. They could practically button-mash their way to victory. I hate.
Right, anyhow, enough of that overly niche analogy, moving on.
It's sad that the Tinder Tradition's came to an end. Nggak juga sih, if anything I think it's the opposite. Eh, but I mean, I dunno. I'll admit, my spring breaks back home would all be nothing but complete snooze fests if it weren't for that app, and I did have a lot of... interesting interactions with equally interesting people, though a majority of them I don't even talk to anymore, which segues perfectly into why I don't like it. A lot of the interactions I had on (and from) there is short-lived, and I guess that's the whole point of the app? I dunno, but needless to say, it feels like anyone that actually keeps in touch with you for more than a week after the match is an outlier. A month? Almost equal to winning the powerball. Anything beyond that is probably God's way of showing that He's feeling sorry for you.
... saying that, I do have Cylona and Agar for my case, but shshshhhh dasnotthepoint, okay? Again,
o u t l i e r s.
But yeah, I do feel like the small serotonin bursts from getting those matches are not really worth the time and effort (and data) anymore. Not to mention, being an emotionally starved entity myself, it doesn't satisfy anymore, and the whole experience only makes me feel worse afterwards, generally speaking.
Lepas libur musim semi dan gue kembali ke Jepang, things simmered down a bit, and everything went back to a plateau for a whole semester long. But it got interesting again come summer time, around September, as I got my second job as a pool guard (which, by the way, post still on the way, I'm just a big sad slob) and also, that whole fiasco with the teaching job happened (which you can read here).
Dan, dalam sekejap November tiba, dan gue dapet lagi kerjaan sebagai guru bahasa Inggris. Namun, kali ini kerjaannya di Fukuoka, and it was a complete 180 from the previous teaching gig. First off, the venue. It was at a country club, located just outside of the main city. I'll tell you what, I've never been to a place that reeks the upper class more than this place, boy it was fan-cy. Everything was accommodated, too, from the train tickets (to and fro), the overnight stay, and even the food. On top of that, the students this time around were waaay more active and enthusiastic than the previous. They were 10th graders, and while their English is still on the iffy side, it was pretty obvious that this school has a much better English program than the last one. It was only a two day program, but those two days are more memorable than anything else I've done in my recent history.
Finally, December came. An old friend of mine, Estrella, now known as Hokben ever since he's lived in Japan, came to visit Beppu. We went on a little road trip to Nagasaki, and man was it a blast. A two-day, sleep-in-car-while-parked-in-parking-building type of trip, but it was great time. Nagasaki's one helluva city. I like very much yes. Also, we talked a lot about our past. And feelings. And other mushy stuffs. It was like 2am, you know what happens to two bros in a bedroom together during those hours. May or may not make a separate post about this one.
Now here we are. The dawn, well, not really, the late afternoon of the final day. Guess what I'm doing tonight.
Working that late shift, baby.
Since a lot of the part-time pool guards are off somewhere to celebrate new year, I was asked to work this new year's eve. Initially, I didn't wanna, but then they asked me to do it, and I don't know how to say "no". I mean, on the bright side, it does mean more money for moi, and a little extra bread couldn't hurt. Besides, not like I have anything better to do anyway. Off to a party? Unlikely. Drinking? I don't do that, too. Getting a new year's kiss? Sama siapa nyet. By working, at least I'm not spending another new year eating McDonald's. In my bedroom. Alone.
I am fully intending to keep up the New Year's McDonald's, though.
But yeah, that's another year in the books. Sorry I haven't been posting, I have a lot of time to write but often time, my mind's just not into it.
Year number twenty one was a pleasant surprise, though it really doesn't take much for me to have a "good" year, but still. And also, what a decade it has been, eh? Did the first half of the decade even happen? I vaguely remember being an absolute asswipe, but it all felt like such a distant past, like a dream, almost. And with everything that's happened in this 10-year time frame, it does beg the question,
how the hell am I still alive?
Welp, dunno, don't care, and I ain't gonna ask too many questions, but for whatever reason it may be, I'm just grateful to be here.
Anyhooooo, I guess I'm gonna end this with another thank you, for reading my nonsensical online diary ramblings. I know there's not that many of you, but still, I'm truly thankful, like for real, from the bottom of my heart, it means a lot, I just can't express it enough.
And of course, happy new year y'all. Hope you all had a great year, and decade, for that matter. If you didn't, well I hope there's plenty to learn from for you to take going into this new year and new decade. Let's try and make it a much better one, eh?
Here's to a swell 2020. Be safe out there.
xo,
R
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